- it's not really a company, it's just a name.


Night of the Cane

The Firm's Annual Caning Competition has gone on-line for the first time in its hoary history. In fine:

  • The Video Entries must be in by December the 13th (you've got until midnight.)

  • The Judging will be held on December the 20th.

  • The full rules are here.

That's "Two Months of the Cane"? And it's already started. I would say 'It's only just begun', but that's a sore point.

Virtually out of lockdown?

Gossip! - Open Soon?

But they'll be back on Thursday the 3rd.

Their website still says 'closed' tonight (Thursday), and their FaceBook page isn't heralding anything. Waiting for the weekend?

Virtual/Real Mistress Workshops

Miss Kim is holding group workshops on-line as required - daily, except possibly for Saturday the 5th of December when she might be holding an 'in-person group session'.


. . . of Wolverhampton in the Midlands are also aiming to re-open in December, on Saturday the 5th. Probably.

NGM have cancelled their December school date.

2 Kings

Are hoping to manage a small Christmas event or two. Or three, no, four.

TG . . .

. . . are still at it, having organised another two Pearl Necklaces. Yep, two.

Zara du Rose . . .

2020 Caberet of Excess remains in December.

Miss Hastings, of The Carlton College/Punishment Club, has gone the on-line/telephone route.

(Even Toyah is broadcasting 'At Home' at 11am. on Saturday mornings. Last week she said “I'm not gay - I'm married”. Priceless.)

Industrial Dance

Might as well grin and bear it - some Christmas Dances . . .

Let's start with Cirwana Black in the worst outfit of the season:

Cyanide Vice improves on that (perhaps it's the vinyl stockings?):

And Wendy tops the lot:

That's your Christmas double bonus: it's also got Cyanide Vice in it! I didn't base the ordering on the music . . .


Lady Naomi Rouge, of No Way Out, has another Special, called Latex Overnight Ekstase.

Twelve hours of 'slippery lust', with an interesting choice of play-patterns.

But why . . .

. . . oh why have they done that weird Lloyds Bank advert? Have ALL the recordings of The Carpenters been erased? (And is it really Dalek Khan who re-recorded it? That's the whisper in the official silence.)

You'd think there would be at least a couple of master tapes around, and that after Karen's death they'd have looked after them a bit better. (The Carpenters: Their Greatest Hits program was on t'telly the other night. According to the guide it contained 'fun facts'. Bet 1983 was short on laughs.)

Listen to the original and ask 'Did we need a new version?'. Surely they have to pay royalties anyway? And I swear they put it on more often since I wrote this.

Perhaps the real reason it annoys me is that it is so like the original - but slightly wrong. I think that the full version becomes more different later on, but the advert only plays the first bit.

Alphabetti Spankghetti?

Our Firm friend Peter Birch has announced the publication of Alphabetical Spanking. An handsome hardback tome, illustrated by Josh.

Soon to be available at a major online retailer for twenty quid, it is obtainable already for the special launch price of £10.

Or even as an e-book, for less than a fiver.

Goings & Comings

Some musings on the year that was and the year that hasn't come. That last one is on a bit of an hiatus. Might be an autumn rush. If so, it'll have to be soon . . .


'Toyah at Home' - broadcast on Saturday mornings at 11am. (And Sunday Lunchtimes.)

Toyah briefly resumed touring early in 2020, but got rescheduled and cancelled.

Many dates, especially the Electric Ladies dates (which co-star Hazel O'Connor), are now re-scheduled until next year. Here's a snippet of her Rubber Revalations.

Maybe you saw her in Quatermass on Talking Pictures TV?